And that sucks.
Hard.
You can't control if someone wants to be with you or not.
You can't force someone to make decisions that would be healthy for them.
You can't make anyone treat you a certain way - we, apparently, have to teach others how to treat us (this one has blown my mind as I've become a young woman).
When I was young, I controlled what I could - my grades, my room (where everything went, all things had their own space).
As I've started to grow and mature,
I've learned the hard way that I cannot control things.
Having my parents separate at 16, that's what started it in a conscious way
working through THAT stuff, I learned I can't control how my dad behaves, how he chose to treat certain people growing up and what he modeled for me.
In my first dating relationship, I learned I can't pull someone along with me to grow.
Sometimes the paths start to veer off in opposing directions -- and that's okay.
In my post-break up life, I learned I can't force someone to be ready to be with me
In my second dating relationship, I learned I can't take on all of my partner's "stuff" to make them better
As a healer and empath, this was hard to differentiate and sift through.
I now always love myself through all of my choice, and decisions.
Once you learn to relinquish control
and fall into the flow of life
surrender to it
you can make room for miracles
for miraculous happenings
I've learned to stay and work on my own path
and if someone wants to join
or is walking by my side for a brief period of time,
then so be it <3
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